Parenting Math

Funny Business

There is a very strong negative  correlation between how much a child needs a nap and how much a child wants a nap. (It is significant on the p=.0h my GOD, go to BED level.)

(1 child + 1 Popsicle) 5 minutes alone = 2 hours of clean up

It is impossible to divide a piece of gum in to three equal parts. (At least, that is what my children have lead me to believe with their hollering about who got the “big” piece.)

Five-teen is definitely a real number. Please stop telling Rain Man otherwise. The “Five-teen Fits” are getting a little absurd. (I will just have to send his teacher a fruit basket next year as an apology.)

Expensive ingredients + large amount of effort and time spent in preparation = Disinterested eaters

Box of macaroni and cheese + “Oh, crap. Lunch is in 5 minutes” = Famished and delighted diners

(1 boo-boo + 1 bandage) kisses from Mama = All better!




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