Apples

Funny Business

My kids eat a ridiculous amount of apples. I mean, I guess that is great. I could have just said, “my kids eat a ridiculous amount of Chubby Hubby ice cream”. That would have sounded far worse.

But, their apple habit is expensive! I bought eight pounds of honeycrisp apples on Sunday. Today, Johnny Appleseed would be hard pressed to find even a core to dig some seeds out of.

Who can blame them, though? A good, tasty (I have been chastized by a farmer’s wife for using the word “delicious” to describe apples that are not of the Red Delicious variety so, I am trying to retrain myself…) apple really hits the spot on a fall day.

The only drawback of apples: They make very hard and painful weapons of mass confusion. Empire apples are the worst. Trust me, you don’t want to get in the middle of a fast pitch apple game when THOSE are being lobbed.

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