Dad Guest Blog

parenting fail

Well, dear readers, I have a treat (or some kind of strange punishment) for you today. The other half of the Mompocalypse (The Daddagheddon?) will be presenting a guest column today. Please enjoy my husband’s contribution to questionable parenting on the Internet!

——

I think I should have my own show on the Food Network.  It will be called “Dad Can Cook?”  Every week, you will get to see me prepare…something from a box.

Imagine the excitement!

Will dad read ALL of the instructions before proceeding?

Will there be milk this time, or will there be a “creative substitute” involving mayonnaise and water?  

Oh shoot…that was supposed to be covered?!

How many rounds of golf will be needed with the County Medical Examiner afterwards to “calm things down”?

Then the show takes a dramatic turn as dad presents the meal to the fickle (and noticeably-underdressed) children.  Will they turn their noses up?  Will they demand it be doused in ketchup?  Or will they gobble it up despite (or maybe because of) the surprise mystery ingredients?

And then, at the very end of the show, there will be a segment called “Lessons Learned” where my darling and ever-patient wife will explain all the “wrong turns” I made while I pretend to take notes.

Now…who wants some cheese(?) lasagne casserole?  Yum!

 

“Daddagheddon” has his own blog!  He discusses much more cerebral topics like college, and music, and…stuff. You should read it!

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6 thoughts on “Dad Guest Blog

  1. Shut the Front Door!! Mayo and water as a substitute for milk??? Does that actually work???

    1) I run out of milk far too often for a woman who passes Wal Mart and a grocery store to come home every day.

    2) I have a lactose intolerant child who loves mayo.

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