I Need a Bigger Bed


It was about 1:37 in the morning when I realized I need a bigger bed. Immediately.

As you may know, we indulge my daughter’s habit of starting her night in our bed. (I say “we” but I know my husband would be quick to say it is me and me alone that allows her these liberties. He has a hard-line policy of, “You stay in your own bed or so help me…” I have a slightly more liberal policy of, “But she likes to cuddle so much….”) Aili snuggles to sleep, curled up next to me until her father comes to bed every night. Regardless of how comfortable she is, he will scoop her up and deposit her unceremoniously in her own bed. Usually while grumbling. More often than not, she will wake up in the middle of the night to use the toilet and will detour to our bed instead of returning to her own when she is done. The end result is that most mornings she wakes up right where she started her night. Last night was definitely one of those boomerang nights where she came back to our bed at some time in the night and found a spot right in the middle of the bed.

The body count in the bed was 2 adults and a four year old.

The cats have been rather cautious around the kids since the ceiling fan incident so, they spend a lot of time in whatever room the children are not occupying during the day. When we get to night time, they are starved for attention. As soon as I go to bed, the cats usually rush the bed and purr their heads off as they find the most choice spots to sleep. (Usually my face.) So they were definitely camped out with us.

Now the body count in bed is 2 adults, a four year old, and 2 cats.

At some point in the night, Robert fell out of his bed and started to howl. He came running to me and started crawling in to bed. I can’t resist snuggling with my normally anti-cuddling child so, I welcomed him in. He’s a pretty big kid, though so I really had to pack in next to Aili and the cats to find room for him. And of course he brought his own pillow and blanket with him.

2 adults, a four year old, 2 cats, a whimpering first grader, an extra pillow and a full-sized quilt in a queen sized bed.

If everyone would have remained mannequin-still, we may have been able to make this work. Unfortunately, Robert is an argumentative sleeper. He fights with his blankets, kicks, and sweats. He’s also one of those people who’s body temperature sky rockets when they sleep so sleeping next to him is like sleeping with a sticky, wet, electric blanket on “high” that kicks.

Honestly, it’s not good for beauty rest.

The cats got agitated by Robert’s squirming so they started to fight with each other in a mini turf war. On my feet.

“Mama, I gotta go pee,” said Aili’s sleepy voice from somewhere in the folds of the covers, stuck somewhere in the middle. Oh Lord, how am I going to extract her without pitching at least two people off the bed?!

That was at 1:36 this morning.


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